“You don’t have to control your thoughts. You just have to stop letting them control you.” – Dan Millman
Upper Limit Barriers sabotage our success or cause us not to enjoy our achievements.
During my years of coaching and studying the companies that made the INC 500 list, and then failed within two years of making the list, I’ve concluded that an entrepreneur’s Upper Limit Barriers are a significant underlying cause of their business failures.
The origins of our Upper Limits Barriers are the messages we heard about ourselves as children from the “powerful” people around us. As a result, our thermostats get set low early in our lives. When we achieve success, above our artificial ceiling, we are prone to find ways of bringing ourselves back down.
It goes like this. I believe my success will steal from someone who needs it more. If I continue to reach for my full potential, I will make others in my family, friends, or peer group feel bad. So we hold back or find a way to self-sabotage.
In his book The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level, Gay Hendricks writes,
“This barrier is very common among gifted and talented children. They get a lot of their parents’ attention, but they may also get a subliminal message. The gifted child is often convicted of stealing attention from other members of the family.
One unconscious solution gifted children devise is to turn down the volume on their genius, so the others don’t feel threatened by it. The other answer is to continue to shine brightly but turn down the volume on their enjoyment of it. If they can appear to be suffering, they can get empathy and sympathy from others instead of jealousy.”
How sad.
So don’t shine too much, or you’ll make others feel bad. If you are worried that your success will steal attention from someone you believe needs it more, it may be holding you back from achieving your ultimate success. YOU DON’T HAVE TO LET IT!
Most of the guilt we feel is for crimes we didn’t commit. If you resolve to remove the guilt your parents and siblings convicted you of, you can liberate yourself from the main issues that trigger this Upper Limits Barrier.
Any gifted child can potentially get in real trouble because of the way they are handled. – Itzhak Perlman
Moe and I were so inspired by the book The Big Leap that we became certified Big Leap coaches. We coach it to our clients and have given Big Leap presentations in Mexico, Australia, Nepal, The Cayman Islands, The Entrepreneurs Masters Program, and throughout the USA.
The Big Leap teaches you how to identify your zone of genius and the importance of spending as much of your time as possible there, and how to overcome the four Upper Limits Barriers.